Monday, October 10, 2011

I just get so tired of this sometimes.

Tuesday, April 05, 2011

quantity is job 1...

so many ways my life could have gone
so many turns that could have been wrong

yet is this exactly where god wants my life
will it always be filled with failing and strife?

i'm not like the prophets i can't hear his voice
it's not like i'm judas - not given a choice

deep in the heart they said i'd be free
deep in the heart i've found all but me

five hundred thirty days have passed all too fast
the sunshine is fading the daylight won't last

oh where is his calling where does his path go
if i do not act - no solutions i'll know

Friday, November 20, 2009


often i think
dream if you will
and i smile
at least
that's true

on occasion you
don't have the time
and please know i'm fine
at least i have you
that's true

over these months
don't fret if you
aren't able
and don't feel 
that time's on your side

oh i think of you my
dearest of friends
and i realize
all i can do is
to live


Friday, October 30, 2009

i'm sorry...

words elude me
over and over
and over
yet thoughts
and feelings
still simmer
with tendency
to look back
and wonder why


and i 
said goodbye

for fear 
of what
of pain
of rejection?

whatever the cause
it doesn't matter
time has passed
new loves found
(and for me lost again)
we walk on
to futures
of life and love

i was never
a good friend
to you
to anyone

but never forgotten

i am
words enough
cannot express

friendships should
be stronger than i
ever allowed them to be
and so i say
thank you
for showing me friendship

thank you
for loving me

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

the last time...

I promise this'll be the last time, for a very long time, that I officially switch blogs. I mean, I might write on here every now and then for the next two months, but past that I doubt at all.

So please visit and read your hearts away, comment away, and scrutinize and love.

Because I love you.


Sunday, August 09, 2009

winding down...

not too many more posts here. change of location means change of blog address. i'll pass it out soon, and make sure i don't have too many posts written on it before i do.

Saturday, August 08, 2009

a beautiful day...

i went camping this last week. i should have pictures soon. my camera broke in costa rica so i used the camera my friend had with him. less than a week, i promise.

today is more time spent up in costa mesa. pool extravaganza with wix and sim.

i should clean my room this week...

Friday, July 31, 2009

dear readers...

apparently you actually are interested in any sort of goings-ons in my life. 

it's hard to write about it though - because when it comes to big life plans and decisions i'm more of a one-on-one type of guy. or really in terms of any conversations. but there are some of you that i won't see for a while, and so i suppose this merits the information to be shared here.

one of the whole reasons for having a blog right? makes sense, i guess.

this move's been a long time coming, and still the countdown is at 80 days today - but in 80 days i will be driving myself over to the small state of texas, in the city of san antonio. between now and then i have a lot going on, so that is why it is 80 days and not 10, but i figured i might as well let the cat out of the bag to surprise as few people as possible.

and i think the emotion of it all is slowly starting to set in. seeing my older sister cry when i told her last night wasn't helpful. the constant "why are you moving, again"s won't get old, but why do i second-guess myself whenever someone asks that question? i was reminded last week though, that if i go off of emotion and feelings then i'm going to stay - and not move in the direction i truly know i'm supposed to go in. people are going to be sad to see me go, and people are going to be happy to see me arrive - which isn't necessarily a catch 22, but the phrase sounds good enough to use.

i'm going to miss my family tons. yes.
i'm going to miss my friends lots. yes.
the beach. yes.
the weather. yes.
scooter. yes.
lots more. yes.

no, i don't know where i'm going to work yet.
i don't know who i'm going to live with.
i don't know a lot of things.

but i know i'm supposed to go. i know things will work out all in due time.

and i'm more than excited to see how everything happens and where my life is headed.